When You Become Desperate For God

Holy Spirit you are welcome here! I give you the pen to this blog and pray that the meditation of my heart and the words of my mouth be acceptable in your sight. I pray that these words will bless someone and encourage them to become desperate for seeing your perfect and wonderful plan for their life.

As I was spending time with God last night, I began to feel a sense of discouragement and lack of enthusiasm for God and his word. I didn’t know why I felt this way. I normally love spending quiet time in the word but at this particular moment, I felt so alone and defeated that I didn’t really want to get into Gods presence. I felt that things were just too hard.

All day long, I had been entertaining thoughts from the enemy of feeling lonely and isolated from others.  I made plans to see a movie with a friend but she later sent me a text saying that she could no longer attend. While I was upset, I also knew that I could take care of some things that I needed to do such as getting groceries for the week and visiting the nail shop to get a nail repaired. I was a little down because I had been feeling that God was doing something in me but it often felt lonely and that I would have to give up some friendships in order to truly run after him.

That can be a scary place when you are 28 years old, to feel like God is calling you to go deeper in him but you also know it’s going to cost you something. The cost can mean spending less time around people and more with God. It can mean stepping into the unknown.

I wanted God to give me a desire to seek him but God told me that my healing wasn’t going to come from me hoping and wishing that God would make me want him. I didn’t know what to do but one thing I knew is that I wasn’t leaving until I got a breakthrough from God.

That’s when God put Mark 5:21-43 on my heart.  He said “Paige, just like the woman with the issue of blood, it’s your desperation that gets my attention.” Its when cant understand everything that is happening in your life, yet you praise God anyways. You may not know how to fix everything in your life, but when you know that if you can just touch the hem of his garment then you will be made whole, then you desperately run after him.

To be desperate for something, means to have a great need or desire for that thing. When you become desperate for God, it means that you desire and need him in such a way that you are willing to press pass anything else to get to him. All of us have obstacles in our lives that will try to keep us from getting to God.

But when you chase after God like your life depends on it, he will meet you where you are and open up the windows of heaven and pour you out a blessing that you don’t even have room enough to receive! God is saying when you become desperate for me, it causes my heart to break in such a way that I have no choice but to Bless you!

God wants us to be dependent on him and when we cry out to him, desperate for change, like the woman with the issue of Blood, we can experience a miraculous healing and breakthrough.